RAWALPINDI: Retired and serving Pakistan Army generals have decided to sue Argentina forward Lionel Messi for retracting his retirement ‘because it was best for his country’. ISPR DG Asim Bajwa confirmed this in a tweet earlier today.
“Lionel Messi is an institution,” Bajwa said later while addressing a press conference. “And for Argentina’s biggest institution to impersonate Pakistan’s biggest institution in such a blatant manner calls for legal repercussions.”
The DG ISPR confirmed that a legal notice on behalf of Pakistan has been sent to the International Court of Justice (ICJ). “The notice says that blatantly taking a selfish decision and calling it love for your country, while being worshipped by the nation was a clear attempt to emulate Pakistani generals, especially former Army chiefs,” Bajwa told the media. “We’re hoping we’ll get justice.” Bajwa said Pakistan Army’s copyrights have been violated.
“We overthrow democratic governments in national interest; we retract decisions to organise free and fair elections in national interest; our chiefs take back their promise of coups being temporary in national interest,” he said. “The copy rights violation is blatant and crude.”
Shunning accusations of being Cristiano-funded, Bajwa confirmed that many of the signatories in the notice sent to the ICJ were in fact ‘huge Messi fans.’
“Our love for Messi doesn’t come in between our love for Pakistan, and there is no better way to love Pakistan than loving Pakistan Army as you all know,” Bajwa said. “And this is precisely why we won’t tolerate anything trying to emulate Pakistan Army. We won’t allow anyone to copy Pakistan.”
Earlier, Shahid Afridi had urged sports fans to not take Messi’s first retirement seriously, predicting that there would be many more to follow. Considering the mighty Pakistan Army’s legal notice, the Argentinean wouldn’t want to repeat the mistake.
This satire originally appeared in Khabaristan Times and has been reproduced with permission